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March to the Match: Rochester Rhinos


Rochester Raging Rhinos, 9-5-8, 35 points, 6th place Eastern Conference


Louisville City’s 24th USL match of 2016


Saturday, August 13, 2016, 7:30 PM Eastern Daylight Time, which is just an illusion used to sequence events, to compare the duration of events or the intervals between them, and to quantify rates of change of quantities in material reality or in the conscious experience, really.


Louisville Slugger Field, 401 East Main Street, Louisville, Kentucky, US and A, North America, Earth, Milky Way, Universe, a speck of dust. Dust in the wind.


You’ll be there. You need to be there. You should be there. Be there. But if you can’t be there because you blew your own mind thinking about what’s actually real, man, you can still watch the game on YouTube here:


Taylor H dropped his match preview yesterday, so check it out if you haven’t already. You could be forgiven for not being super excited about this match. Rochester is very good at defense. Louisville’s been struggling at offense. City’s only won four times in eleven tries at home this season. City hasn’t won a home game in over a month. City hasn’t beaten a playoff team not named Orlando at Slugger all season. I’ll stop now.

BUT! There’s reason for hope. This is sports. Slumps happen. Rochester doesn’t score much, and they’ve only scored eight away goals all season. The Rhinos have only picked up eleven points on the road in ten matches.

Make no mistake, Rochester is a good opponent. But maybe that’s what Louisville City needs? Crappy opponents like Harrisburg sure don’t seem to get City’s dander up lately, so perhaps the Rhinos are the squad that the Royals break out against. Beating up patsies isn’t nearly as fun as beating good teams. Let’s do that, hm?


It’ll be a game that looks more like rugby than soccer. There will be a lot of fouls. There will be a lot of Rochester counter attacks. There will be a lot of players in Rochester’s 18 yard box. I will not attempt to predict a score.


Drinking beer and enjoying the company of friends and fans is never a bad time, so do that with us starting at 6:00 at the Troll Pub at 2nd and Washington, or go tailgate, or go hang out with Adam and the Heretics at Against the Grain at the stadium. But join us for the march at 7! It’s loud, it’s fun, it’s what’s missing from your week! See you there.