Sorry about the tardy, y’all, the real job got in the way of bringing you the excellent #content you’ve come to expect from me and this fair webpage. Lots of news and non-stories to talk about, so let’s get to it:

We thought the USL was going to announce the 2016 schedule on Thursday last week, and with FC Cincinnati announcing their first two home games earlier in the week it seemed like a logical expectation. But USL was like “GET OUT OF HERE WITH YOUR LOGIC AND EXPECTATIONS, HERE’S A TICKET CONTEST.” So yeah. Good news is the schedule will be out tomorrow, and we’ll break it down on Wednesday.

In better league-wide news, here’s a picture of the match ball we’ll be seeing this year. 

Nice.

Also, in other USL non-announcements, the league detailed its 2016 conference alignments and playoff format. This season will feature 30 games per team (last season there were 28 games) and two (TWO!) additional playoff spots up for grabs. A couple thoughts: First, that header image is the one released by the league, and no, the colors do not make any sense at all. Apple Maps had a better release than that. Second: Call me old fashioned, but I kind of can’t stand it when more than half the teams in the league make the post-season. Wasn’t last year’s red line bonanza fun enough? NOW GET OFF MY LAWN. With respect to our Eastern Conference, Saint Louis is going bye bye but we’ll add Bethlehem Steel FC (Philadelphia Union’s MLS 2 team), Orlando City B, and of course FC Cincinnati.

Are you a Louisville City season ticket holder? YOU BETTER BE. If you’re not, then you’ll miss out on the chance to score some early tickets to this year’s Copa America Centenario, held right here in These United States. I’m not going to any of the games because my wife doesn’t understand why I like soccer so much, but that shouldn’t stop YOU from going. It’ll be awesome. Tell me all about it while I cry myself to sleep.

There’s lots more coming this week, including Louisville City’s preseason schedule and THE BIG ONE, USL’s full season schedule, so keep it LOCKED ON www.louisvillecoopers.com for all your Louisville City soccer needs.